So, I wrote this thing in Boston. it's based on the premise of comedian Yakov Smirnoff being a toothbrush...puns are notated by bold font.
"In Tooth-Brussha, instead of fluoride in water, we have cyanide in water. is not like opposite side of iron braces, not like your Floss-Angelis. If only tooth-brussia had fake tittied teeth! They say you wear imperialist crowns and chew the fat of poisonous freedoms that will rot a society through it's roots. But Tooth-Brussia...what a country! The molar bears in Siberian Gumdra are so fierce...In tooth-brussia, the molar bears melt your homes away! In tooth-brussha, Gingevitus catches you! Huh-boy..."